Side Salad and Mom

So many foods immediately remind me of my childhood and my Mom. I have kept track of each of those memories in a journal that has become one of my prize possessions. Each memory of my mother's dinners, described quickly in my journal, has one common denominator: the side salad.

Mom taught me to eat square meals because that is what she cooked. At the time, I probably wished that I had the mother that would order out for pizza, go through the fast food drive-thru, or cook things like Velveeta Shells & Cheese. That was not my mother at all. I am not claiming deprivation. She did treat us to things like McDonald's when it was appropriate (and probably when she had the extra cash). We did order Chinese take-out on special occasions too. She cooked most nights, though, and she always cooked a well-balanced meal. It was rare if we didn't eat dinner together as a family and it was not unlike us to invite one of our friends from the neighborhood. I remember our dining room table in the Hurley, NY kitchen the most, set into a breakfast nook overlooking the backyard through the yellow curtained windows. Somehow, we all fit around the table and it was conveniently located right off the kitchen so Mom could go back and forth to retrieve more food.

We had the formal dining room, which was definitely a room Mom was proud of. She kept her beautiful china and serving ware there, but we rarely used the room unless we had a special guest or it was a holiday. Instead, we liked our cozy little breakfast nook for everyday dinners. Dinner always consisted of meat, starch and vegetable. Whether it was meatloaf, potato and vegetable or Salisbury steak, rice and vegetable it always came together in the meat, starch, and vegetable combination. Mom used frozen vegetables and not canned. This is a practice that I still follow, as the preservatives in the canned variety have always left a bad taste in my mouth and then there is the matter of the soft, mushy texture.

No matter the menu at Mom's, there was always the salad with dinner. Early on, she decided that it was appropriate to teach us that we should eat our fresh vegetables and greens with each meal. We looked forward to the salad portion of dinner. Although it probably filled us up a bit and helped conserve the main course, it was not inexpensive to provide fresh produce with every meal, for a family of six, I'm sure. If this was her goal, I'm sure she would have found other ways to fill us up- more economical ways- more potatoes, more rice, etc. Sometimes the salads were intricate and inclusive of so many wonderful ingredients. Mom was not afraid to experiment and she would purchase a fruit or vegetable that we have never tried just for fun. I remember her buying me a star fruit once just so I could taste it. We enjoyed it when we got home from the grocery, but I don't think either of us have ever had another one.

Usually the salad consisted of very simple ingredients like iceberg lettuce, tomatoes and cucumbers. She would put the big bowl of salad in the center of the table and we would serve ourselves into the smaller, Corningware dinner bowls. Mom kept a box of croutons in the pantry and she would reach in for a few sometimes. She would offer them to all of us, but usually she was the one who wanted them most. I think if we allowed, she would have been much more creative with the salads. I have seen her load up a salad plate at a salad bar and she is the one putting things like chick peas, sunflower seeds, croutons and bacon bits on top. We had a couple of choices of dressing and my sister, Penny, requested her dressings by color. She would say, "orange" for French dressing, "white" for ranch, etc. Dad would always have a piece of bread or two with some butter. This was actually sandwich bread with Country Crock spread, but seemed to do the trick. As I got older, I copied him and I would also reach for a piece of bread and ask him to pass the butter. This was especially important if we were having spaghetti or lasagna.

Sometimes when my friends would come for dinner, they would comment that they didn't like the salad or that this was new to them. My father would tell them, just like he had told us, that they would have to eat their salad before they could be served dinner. One time, my friend accidentally put too much salad dressing in theirs and it looked more like soup. My Dad told him that he had to eat it because "we will not be wasting any food at our dinner table tonight." I felt bad for my friend, but I knew that this was a normal practice for our family. We did not waste food in any way that I could remember.

My brother, sisters and I quickly grew to enjoy the salads Mom served. Recently, I started remembering this tradition again and have started to serve a basic side salad alongside the meals I cook at home. I try to make them all a little different, but they are all very simple. I am not sure I would be serving these nutritious salads now had Mom not formed this habit for me when I was a child. I thank her for that and I hope to enjoy a salad with her soon.